Today Le Monde Magazine is going to interview the family dog, Buddy.
Le Monde: Buddy we understand that you live with the Stalcup family in Reston.
Buddy: Yes, I am their only pet. There was another dog when I arrived, but I got rid of him!
Le Monde: You got rid of him?
Buddy: Yes. Buster was okay, as dogs go, but he lacked the essential charm of a miniature poodle; he was too calm, too aloof, too . . . big.
Le Monde: How did you manage to get rid of him?
Buddy: Oh, little things. It wasn’t hard. I pranced on my hind legs, and hopped onto empty laps and looked fetching. The next things I knew, he was gone. Rumor is, he is buried in the back yard under a pile of white rocks.
Le Monde: How did you come to live with the Stalcups?
Buddy: I was rescued. It was quite dramatic really. My first home was with a family of Jack Russells. A despicable breed. While the Madame was home, she carried me everywhere and I was a happy pup. Then she began leaving the house for hours at a time and the Jack Russells refused to follow my instructions. Those dogs made my life miserable. I really don’t want to talk about it. Poodles rule!